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女权主义者的性欲观

女权主义者的性欲观(读书笔记:杰茜卡瓦伦蒂:《正面全裸的女权主义》)作者直接感到,女权主义者都是些身穿男子西装剪着娘子发型叼着香烟不刮腋毛的中性人,直到读了瓦伦蒂那本《正面全裸的女权主义》。今后才驾驭过来,原本女权主义者也是有七情六欲的!不独有如此,她们的私欲比平日女人更加直白,越来越强势,更自私。瓦伦蒂用了全方位二个章节来解说女权主义的性欲观。标题是《女权主义者更专长干那件事(以致此外关于性的提示)FEMINISTS DO IT BETTE卡宴 (AND OTHEEscort SEX TIPS)》。她直抒己见就作者炫酷“笔者在床面上比你行,而那得归功于女权主义。”(I'm better in bed than you are. And I have feminism to thank for it.)今世男权社会对女人有一种自相厌恶的双重标准:一方面,女子在大庭广众收受“守贞教育”,早上则在电视机上看看“女孩也疯狂”的广告。一方面,女孩被感化说婚前性行为是不对的,另一方面又报告你,你若想成为一名春假辣妹,你尽快对着镜头宽衣解带吧!(When you're getting abstinence-only education during the day and Girls Gone Wild commercials at night, it's not exactly easy to develop a healthy sexuality. You're taught that sex before marriage is bad bad bad, but that if you want to be a springbreak hottie, you'd better start making out for the camera.)守贞文学家是这样来教育女人的:“你们的身体正是一根棒棒糖。当你们与男士爆发性关系时,他剥去你的外衣,含吮起来。那时候大概认为不错,可缺憾的是,他与您完事后,你们留给下一人伴侣的就是衣冠不整,口水臭味的糟粕。”("Your body is a wrapped lollipop. When you have sex with a man, he unwraps your lollipop and sucks on it. It may feel great at the time, but unfortunately, when he's done with you, all you have left for your next partner is a poorly wrapped, saliva-fouled sucker. ")够耸人传闻的。可是女权主义者不吃这一套。瓦伦蒂建议的口号是:“作者的处女膜笔者做主!(Our Hymens, Ourselves )”她说:“小编从没闹了然处女贞操有如何大不断,真的。作者的贞操在中学时代就被一名男盆友没怎么费力就夺去了。大家后来还约会了一些年吧。小编还以为会有何样新鲜的感到到啊,未有。小编总认为这种把处女贞操当成如花似玉一回事很愚笨。所以您能够想象,当本人开掘自个儿原本是被用过即弃的废物时有多愕然。”(I have never really understood what the big deal was about virginity. Really. Mine was lost without a great deal of fanfare to a high school boyfriend whom I dated for several years afterward. I expected to feel different—I didn't. The whole precious-flower-virginity thing always seemed silly to me. So imagine my surprise when I found out that I was just a used-up piece of trash without it.)笔者比较纳闷的是,女权主义者总体上是亵渎男士的。然则在拍卖自身的人事时,她们对娃他爸的态势鲜明又是另一番景点。诚然,她们与郎君上床,再亦非为了取悦娃他爸,更不是为了薪火相传,而纯粹是为着和煦的欢娱。用瓦伦蒂露骨的话,正是:一边做女权主义者,一边滚床单!(f***ing while feminist !)只是,面前遭受一个人性欲如此高涨态度如此强势的女权主义床伴,哪壹人小汉子消受得起?

够耸人传闻的。不过女权主义者不吃这一套。瓦伦蒂提议的口号是:“笔者的处女膜作者做主!(Our Hymens, Ourselves )

When I was faced with types of situations I had encountered before, I drew on the principles I had learned for dealing with them. 

只是,面前遭逢壹位性欲如此高涨态度如此强势的女权主义床伴,哪壹人小男士消受得起?

就像biologist, 首先识别难题,寻觅先验知识,然后使用方便的行走。**

”她说:“笔者没有闹明白处女贞操有哪些大不断,真的。笔者的贞操在中学时代就被一名男盆友没怎么费事就夺去了。大家后来还约会了少数年吗。小编还以为会有何非凡的认为呢,未有。笔者总认为这种把处女贞操当成如花似玉三次事很笨拙。所以您能够设想,当本人发掘本人原本是被用过即弃的污物(或棒棒糖)时有多愕然。”(I have never really understood what the big deal was about virginity. Really. Mine was lost without a great deal of fanfare to a high school boyfriend whom I dated for several years afterward. I expected to feel different—I didn't. The whole precious-flower-virginity thing always seemed silly to me. So imagine my surprise when I found out that I was just a used-up piece of trash (or candy) without it.)

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But when I ran into ones I hadn’t seen before, I would be painfully surprised. Studying all those painful first-time encounters, I learned that even if they hadn’t happened to me, most of them had happened to other people in other times and places, which gave me a healthy respect for history, a hunger to have a universal understanding of how reality works, and the desire to build timeless and universal principles for dealing with it.

守贞国学家是那般来教育女人的:“你们的肉体正是一根棒棒糖。当你们与郎君爆发性关系时,他剥去你的糖衣,含吮起来。那时候恐怕感到没有错,可可惜的是,他与您完事后,你们留给下壹人伴侣的正是衣冠不整,口水臭味的残渣。”("Your body is a wrapped lollipop. When you have sex with a man, he unwraps your lollipop and sucks on it. It may feel great at the time, but unfortunately, when he's done with you, all you have left for your next partner is a poorly wrapped, saliva-fouled sucker. ")

My nature being what it is, I would not have changed my life, but I can’t tell you what is best for you. That is for you to choose. What I have seen is that the happiest people discover their own nature and match their life to it.

最近才了解过来,原本女权主义者也可能有七情六欲的!不唯有如此,她们的欲望比平常女子越来越直白,更加强势,更自私。

(部分翻译仅凭个人感到,不完全依照最早的作品翻译)

他开门见山就本人炫丽“小编在床的上面比你行,而这得归功于女权主义。”(I'm better in bed than you are. And I have feminism to thank for it.)

(刚起始的时候,认为市镇和生存中的遭遇的倒闭与主题材料,特别宏大,像非常的险恶的阅历)

自家平素感觉,女权主义者都以些身穿男性西装剪着相公发型叼着香烟不刮腋毛的中性人,直到读了瓦伦蒂那本《正面全裸的女权主义》。

(对于在此之前没境遇的新主题材料,不会认为痛楚。因为开采,就算这么些难点,在此以前本身没遇见过,别的人也会超出过。所以小编非常珍视历史,渴望通晓实际到底是怎么运作的,并期盼创立稳定和广阔的原则来拍卖它。)(简单来说:认知现实的本色,并确立 普及的尺度去管理它, 普及大概可以清楚为 合适的 准确的 )

今世男权社会对女子有一种自相不喜欢的双重标准:一方面,女生在光天化日收受“守贞教育”,下午则在电视上见到“女孩也疯狂”的广告。一方面,女孩被感化说婚前性行为是窘迫的,另一方面又报告您,你若想产生一名春假辣妹,你赶紧对着镜头宽衣解带吧!(When you're getting abstinence-only education during the day and Girls Gone Wild commercials at night, it's not exactly easy to develop a healthy sexuality. You're taught that sex before marriage is bad bad bad, but that if you want to be a springbreak hottie, you'd better start making out for the camera.)

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小编比较纳闷的是,女权主义者总体上是瞧不起汉子的。可是在拍卖自身的情欲时,她们对男士的情态明朗又是另一番风光。诚然,她们与女婿上床,再亦非为了投其所好孩他爹,更不是为着后继有人,而纯粹是为着本身的美观。用瓦伦蒂露骨的话,便是:一边做女权主义者,一边打炮!(Fucking while feminist !)

Having the basics—a good bed to sleep in, good relationships, good food, and good sex—is most important, and those things don’t get much better when you have a lot ofmoney or much worse when you have less.

瓦伦蒂用了整个一个章节来阐释女权主义的性欲观。题目是《女权主义者更擅长干那件事(以致另外关于性的唤起)FEMINISTS DO IT BETTE君越 (AND OTHEGL450 SEX TIPS)》。

(在此之前蒙受的标题,使用已经学到的规格)

I realized that reality was, if not perfect, at least what we are given to deal with, so that any problems or frustrations I had with it were more productively directed to dealing with them effectively than complaining about them. I came to understand that my encounters were tests of my character and creativity. Over time, I came to appreciate what a tiny and short-lived part of that remarkable system I am, and how it’s both good for me and good for the system for me to know how to interact with it well.

In gaining this perspective, I began to experience painful moments in a radically different way. Instead of feeling frustrated or overwhelmed, I saw pain as nature’s reminder that there is something important for me to learn. Encountering pains and figuring out the lessons they were trying to give me became sort of a game to me.

When I started out, each and every twist and turn I encountered, whether in the markets or in my life in general, looked really big and dramatic up close, like unique life-or-death experiences that were coming at me fast.

And the people one meets at the top aren’t necessarily more special than those one meets at the bottom or in between.

(随着年龄和阅历的加强,遭受新题材更是冷静管理)

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You’d be happy at first, but not for long. You would soon find yourself needing something else to struggle for. Just look at people who attain their dreams early— the child star, the lottery winner, the professional athlete who peaks early. They typically don’t end up happy unless they get excited about something else bigger and better to struggle for. Since life brings both ups and downs, struggling well doesn’t just make your ups better; it makes your downs less bad.

I’m still strugglingand I will until I die, because even if I try to avoid the struggles, they will find me.

With time and experience, I came to see each encounter as “another one of those” that I could approach more calmly and analytically, like a biologist might approach an encounter with a threatening creature in the jungle: first identifying its species and then, drawing on his prior knowledge about its expected behaviors, reacting appropriately.

As I look back on my experiences, it’s interesting to reflect on how my perspectives have changed.

In my early years, I looked up to extraordinarily successful people, thinking that they were successful because they were extraordinary. After I got to know such people personally, I realized that all of them—like me, like everyone—make mistakes, struggle with their weaknesses, and don’t feel that they are particularly special or great. They are no happier than the rest of us, and they struggle just as much or more than average folks. Even after they surpass their wildest dreams, they still experience more struggle than glory. This has certainly been true for me.

The marginal benefits of having more fall off pretty quickly. In fact, having a lot more is worse than having a moderate amount more because it comes with heavy burdens. Being on top gives you a wider range of options, but it also requires more of you. Being well-known is probably worse than being anonymous, all things considered. And while the beneficial impact one can have on others is great, when you put it in perspective, it is still infinitesimally small. For all those reasons, I cannot say that having an intense life filled with accomplishments is better than having a relaxed life filled with savoring, though I can say that being strong is better than being weak, and that struggling gives one strength.

While I surpassed my wildest dreams decades ago, I am still struggling today.In time, I realized that the satisfaction of success doesn’t come from achieving your goals, but from struggling well.To understand what I mean, imagine your greatest goal, whatever it is—making a ton of money, winning an Academy Award, running a great organization, being great at a sport. Now imagine instantaneously achieving it.

The more I played it, the better I got at it, the less painful those situations became, and the more rewarding the process of reflecting, developing principles, and then getting rewards for using those principles became.I learned to love my struggles, which I suppose is a healthy perspective to have, like learning to love exercising (which I haven’t managed to do yet).

Thanks to all that struggling and learning, I have done everything I wanted to do,gone everywhere I wanted to go, met whomever I wanted to meet, gotten everything I wanted to own, had a career that has been enthralling, and, most rewardingly, had many wonderful relationships.I have experienced the full range, from having nothing to having an enormous amount, and from being a nobody to being a somebody, so I know the differences.While I experienced them going from the bottom up rather than from the top down (which was preferable and probably influenced my perspective), my assessment is that the incremental benefits of having a lot and being on top are not nearly as great as most people think.

Now that my desire to succeed has given way to a desire to help others succeed, that’s become my current struggle. It’s now clear to me that my purpose, your purpose, and the purpose of everything else is to evolve and to contribute to evolution in some small way.I didn’t think about that at the start; I just went after the things I wanted. But along the way I evolved, and now I am sharing these principles with you to help you evolve too.I realized that passing on knowledge is like passing on DNA—it is more important than the individual, because it lives way beyond the individual’s life. This is my attempt to help you succeed by passing along to you what I learned about how to struggle well—or, at the very least, to help you get the most out of each unit of effort you put in.

Watching the same things happen again and again, I began to see reality as a gorgeous perpetual motion machine, in which causes become effects that become causes of new effects, and so on.

(望着同等的事体三回又二回地发出,我起来把具体看成是八个华侈的永动机,个中的来头成为了震慑成为新效用的要素,等等。大约是 a发生b,b又发出了c)

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